The trial period

I've nearly lost all hope for this blog ever being something. It's rapidly becoming tiresome to me to post my thoughts here, only to have them heard by no one. My original idea of "If you post it, they will come" doesn't exactly work. I've been so bored the past few months- nothing seems to hold my interest for long at all. The guys I hang out with all seem to have their own lives, whereas mine is spent trying to hang onto them. My own hobbies- hiking, fishing, reading- are all done by myself, and are rapidly becoming dull and unexciting. I don't want this prayer group at my house every week as much as I want someone to talk to DAILY about my hopes and problems. We sit, we talk for a while, and after I've shared (usually the shortest of the group,) I drift off into my own little world for the next hour and a half, while the rest of the group yaks on about this or that problem, half-gossiping, then praying elaborately while I dream about everything but God. Even God Himself holds little interest for me right now. I read the other day that we will find God if we seek him with all our heart. Maybe God's trying to break me down to do that. In any case, I've written too much already. Out.